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Although we may never tire of the traditional vows – there is just a romance to using the same words as so many others have for centuries – your love story is unique, and writing your own vows adds that special personal touch to your ceremony. However, it’s not always easy to get all the feelings from your heart down on a piece of paper to share in front of everyone. Here are 5 tips to help you write your own vows.

1. Make Sure Everyone Is On The Same Page

First, talk to both your fiancé and officiant and make sure they are both okay with personalized wedding vows. Once it’s agreed upon, discuss how you’d like your vows to sound. Maybe you want them to be more romantic than humorous, or serious over casual? While you are at it you should ask your S.O. a couple of questions:

• Will you write your vows together or apart?
• Will they be completely different or maybe you’ll make the same promises to one another at the end, similar to traditional vows?
• Will you share them with one another or keep them a secret until the ceremony?

2. Make Promises

Why have you chosen to spend the rest of your life with this person? What does this marriage mean to you? These are some questions you should ask yourself when writing your vows. Reflect on the good times, but consider all the low times you and your partner may have overcome in your relationship as well. Both your fiancé and guests want your vows to be real, so make sure your promises are meaningful to your relationship. You want to show that love is not simply a feeling but a choice, and that you and your partner are choosing to love one another.

3. Look For Inspiration

Expressing your feelings is no easy task. Gather books, poems, quotes and examples of other wedding vows to help you find the right wording for your vows. If you feel that Shakespeare or Taylor Swift said it best, it’s okay to borrow their words.

4. Be Yourself

Don’t feel the pressure to write something that sounds professionally done. Speak from your heart and do your best to de­scribe your emotions. Take the time to think about the person you’ve become because of your fiancé and put that into words. Both your fiancé and guests will appreciate how real you are being with them.

5. Dress Up Your Vows

You may think that having your vows down on paper is enough, but consider how they may they look when they are pulled out of your pocket or purse. Protect your vows by rewriting them in a notebook. This also allows for your vows to become a keepsake after the wedding, and maybe even reread for a vow renewal.